I haven’t written in ages. It’s been an awful 2013 so far, what with family illnesses — both in the human and canine sectors — work challenges, and financial worries. I’ve already broken my one and only New Year’s Resolution, which was to write in this blog more often.
I feel bad. So I’m going to try to make it up to you, loyal readers, by giving you a gift.
Yesterday, I was taking the dogs for their Sunday morning constitutional. I had just left the park and was proceeding down the sidewalk across the street from my house. The sidewalk runs alongside Via Vitellia, a very busy and fast-moving road. The next thing I knew, I was flying through the air.
I still don’t really know what happened — I must have tripped on the ancient and crumbly sidewalk (I do that a lot and also fall down — it goes with the territory of being tall, clumsy and having dogs). I was wearing a pair of loose drawstring pants, which got caught in the cracks in the sidewalk, I guess. As I was hurtling towards the ground, my pants stayed put. I ended up flat out on the sidewalk, my unclad butt in the air for all to see and my pants around my ankles. Fortunately, I was wearing a longish jacket but for sure there would have been a few seconds there when I was mooning Via Vitellia, which was — of course — crowded with people driving to church or the soccer game or Sunday lunch.
Only one guy slowed down his car and, as he did, I could actually see his thoughts flashing across his face: “Should I stop? Maybe she’s hurt? But how can I help? She’s not wearing pants! Not sure how to handle this. I’d best move along.” Can’t say that I blame him. I must have looked deranged.
Meanwhile, the dogs were standing patiently by, observing me with their heads cocked to one side, as if to say “Whatcha doin’?” I pulled on my pants and ran home as fast as I could.
That story is my gift to you. Everything bad that happens to you this week will simply pale by comparison. You’re welcome